One Potato, Two Potato. Three Potat…oh crap I forgot about third potato!

I am officially the world’s worst mom.  Has anyone else felt like this? Like you’re failing miserably and question just who in their right mind let you leave the hospital with a baby, not once, but THREE separate times?

When my oldest was born, I was crazy.  Like most new moms, I over analyzed every little thing, spent way too long researching car seats, and only bought ergonomically correct, way overpriced ‘but so worth it!’ walking shoes.

Child number two rolled along and I was much more relaxed, simply because I didn’t have as much time to be neurotic. I wiped the dropped pacifier off on my jeans and stuck it right back in his mouth, used the two-year-old infant seat adorned with an abnormal amount of spit up stains, and used the hand-me-down shoes that his older brother wore.

Child number three went more along the lines of: ‘Oh babe!  I just found the old car seat from when the boys were babies!  Go take the new one back!’  ‘Isn’t that the one that had a recall on it?’  ‘Oh stop, she’ll be fine.  Come on,  put it in the car.’

This morning, I officially became the world’s worst mom and it all stemmed from the simple fact that my daughter is the youngest.  It really follows the same pattern as I stated before: Child One had field trips in Pre-K and I chaperoned every single one. I tagged along to the pumpkin farm for Child Two and signed up as a ‘maybe’ on the other trips.

Child Three.  Let me just explain that my daughter is like an appendage on my leg that just happens to be in the form of a four year old girl.  She is attached to me at all times. Pre-K drop off has been traumatic for both of us; she’s having a tough time letting me go, and I’m having a hard time watching her cry as I leave.  Last week a note came home with field trip information to the zoo.  I figured I would let her teacher know I’d chaperone and we’d be good to go.

No beuno.  Here is the gist of the conversation:  ‘Hi, Ms. X, I’d like to help chaperone the trip to the zoo next week.’  ‘Oh, Mrs. Momblog, that’s unfortunate.  We had all of the signups at orientation.’  ‘Oh, yes, I wasn’t able to attend orientation because it was my first day of work for the school year so my husband attended.’  (See?  Child One and maybe even Child Two would’ve had me at orientation–even if it meant getting a sub on the first day of school.  Child Three?  Didn’t even consider it.)  ‘Oh, Mrs. Momblog, your husband didn’t sign up for any field trips.  I’m sorry.’  ‘Well, is there any way I can be added to a different field trip later in the year?’  ‘I’m sorry, no.  All parents have already volunteered.’  ‘Oh.’  ‘Well it’s nice to see you, Mrs. Momblog!  I never get a chance to talk to you because Child Three gets dropped off so early and picked up so late on most days!’  (Yeah.  This is true.  I do drop her off at the ‘Wrap Around’ program which is a daycare for working moms who can’t fit the half day Pre-K schedule into their working mom life.  And Mrs. X didn’t actually say that last part, but I know she was thinking it…because today was the first day that I actually met this woman.  Nice lady though!).

So, that’s that.  I am officially the world’s worst mom and my daughter, my little appendage, is going to be crushed.  She’ll probably cry.  She’ll probably be really shy around the other good mom chaperones who went to orientation and actually talk to the teacher and look at the little orphan ‘Wrap Around’ kids with sadness.

Poor Child Three.  Good thing she’s a girl, at least she gets new clothes.

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And here we have Child Three as I was taking first day of school pictures.

About Mrs Momblog

Mom of 3, wife of 1, teacher of 103. Sarcastic always.
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8 Responses to One Potato, Two Potato. Three Potat…oh crap I forgot about third potato!

  1. Amy says:

    Take the day off and follow the field trip around (she’ll never know).

  2. Alison G. says:

    I think that the teacher was a little rude. As a teacher, we should be able to understand parents that work full time. We should be able to understand that, “does it really matter if there are 7 parents instead of 6″…..so you get to make smaller groups. Who cares if every parents wants to attend…..it shows support! Sorry this happened.

  3. Kimberly says:

    Meet the class at the zoo! It’s a public place, no? We always offer that option to parents!!!!

  4. Jenny says:

    I’m the world’s worst mom for sure. My one year old is at daycare for 9 hours every day. He really does seem fine with it but it makes me feel like a complete jerk.

  5. Alicia says:

    Oh, my gosh, I was just thinking this yesterday! When my sons were younger we’d go to the zoo, aquarium. Childrens’ Museum, parks, etc. So much fun on non-school days, weekends, even after school. Now my sons are in high school and my 10 year old daughter hasn’t gone to the zoo since Kindergarten. . . since Kindergarten! I feel like her childhood has slowly seeped away and now she doesn’t even ask to go to parks anymore. I’m so remiss!

  6. I’m there with you. So there. For my twins, I was room mom for their preschool class, went everywhere I could with them and never missed a party. For their two-year old brother, that’s why we hired a nanny, right? I don’t like it, but now that I’m back to teaching full time, I can’t take him to gymnastics, music class, story time and every other damn toddler activity in town. And you know what? I think he (and your youngest daughter) will be just fine.

  7. herschelian says:

    I just found your blog through Freshly Pressed (congrats BTW). This post amazed me, because, in the UK most Primary Schools (ie schools for kids aged 5 -10/11) would practically kill to get parents to volunteer. Many a time and often one would be phoned the night before a school outing with a desparate teacher begging for you to come and help because someone else had dropped out. Not to put you on the list of potential volunteers seems so inflexible.
    Anyhoo, too late for my kids, they are all grown up and now I am a grandparent, but as my grandson (who is a genius of course) is living in the USA I am really interested in what goes on in American schooling. I’ll be reading your blog regularly as I love your style!!

  8. herschelian says:

    Whoops – spellcheck malfunction – I meant to type ‘desperate’. So sorry.

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